Embracing the chaos

through the lens of life


DENVER NEWBORN PHOTOGRAHER

Do you ever feel like there are not enough hours in the day? I’m a wife, Mom of two young boys and a small business owner. I’m currently writing this blog whilst breastfeeding my baby. I’m looking around the room and chaos surrounds me.  There are pencils scattered across my dining table, a half-finished cup of tea on the kitchen counter, and a pile of laundry that’s on day two of sitting on my sofa. Running a business with a baby, a 6-year-old and no family nearby to ease the load, means I need to multi-task as much as possible, yet I always feel like I’ve not done enough every day.  Amidst the beautiful chaos of motherhood and photography, there's also the constant responsibility of managing a home. The mental load of planning meals, grocery shopping, cleaning, and maintaining a household can feel overwhelming at times.

colored crayons scattered across a table and partly on top of a child's drawing's

This season of motherhood is anything but easy; it's a rollercoaster of emotions, and guilt seems to be a constant companion.


Running my own business, allows me to pursue my passion and be present for my family. However, with this wonderful opportunity comes the struggle of balancing my time between work, my children and my home.


When I dedicate time to my business, I can't help but feel a pang of guilt for not being fully present with my children. When I do spend more time with them, I feel guilty for not focusing on my business. Emails left on read and social media (which seems like a requirement for business owners these days) abandoned.


It's a tug of war that plays out within me every single day.


A child running towards his mother on the beach
A woman spinning her child around on the beach
woman taking photo of pregnant woman.  Maternity photoshoot

I don’t write this blog to seek sympathy or to find a solution to this guilt. This is just me, raw and unfiltered, sharing my perspective as a mother who cherishes her children and values her career. 


I don’t have the answers on how to juggle motherhood and a career without guilt. But I'm learning to embrace the imperfections and find gratitude in the little things.


To all the mothers out there who feel the weight of guilt, know that you are not alone. It's okay to feel torn between your different responsibilities. Your love for your children and your desire to pursue your passions are not mutually exclusive.  Motherhood is a beautifully messy adventure, and we're all just doing our best to navigate the twists and turns.


There are days when I feel like I've got everything under control, and there are days that I struggle. The reality is that no one can do it all, flawlessly, all the time. I'm trying to be kinder to myself and to focus on the moments that truly matter.

boy outside playing with a kite that has landed on his head, he is laughing

Follow me on Instagram

@sapphireskiesbyleanne